It's 2013...ACK!

I can't believe it is 2013. It's true, every year you get older, every year goes by faster and faster. It's like the Japanese Bullet Train, I swear last year went by at 300 km/hr. At the same time though, there were times it felt very very long, as long as the Nile river.

I've been through a lot in the past year. I went through a bout of major depression. It was so bad I was off of work for three months. I slept most of those three months. I ended up getting into a group therapy program to deal with my issues and depression. The therapy program was four months long. Just like this past year, the therapy went by fast and slow at the same time. It was one of the best things I have ever done, but also one of the hardest. There were a lot of tears and a lot of anger. A lot of uncomfortable, awkward moments. I told my Sister, Brother, Mom and Dad that I'm HIV positive. I went back to work, working part time. It's been an eventful, arduous year.

I have never been one to make New Year's Resolutions, but this year I decided I will. I was on UKPositiveLad's blog (http://www.ukpositivelad.com/blog/) and he inspired me to do some resolutions.  I deserve to have a great year after everything I have been through. A great year isn't going to happen by sitting back. I need goals and need to proactively try and reach those goals. My New Year's Resolutions:

1) Be Physically Healthier:

This doesn't mean going on crash diets. This means eating healthier and finding activities I enjoy doing, instead of forcing myself to go to the gym. Currently I drink way to much Pop - I LOVE PEPSI!!!!! - and eat way too much fast food. Also these last few months, I haven't been active because I had undiagnosed Asthma. My Asthma was so bad it was making me sleep all the time and always short of breath. Now that I know I have Asthma and I am on an inhaler and I am slowly starting to feel better, it's time to get back in to being active. I also pledge to become active in a healthy way. What I mean by that is, not to overdo it. I am the type of person that goes big or goes home. I tend to overdo it. I go gung-ho and then get burnt out and go back to my old ways.

2) Be Mentally Healthier:

I've already started achieving this by going through that four month group therapy program last year. This year I would like to work on more positive thinking and expressing my feelings more. I am the type of person that holds everything in and then I end up taking it out on myself. If I am feeling angry or sad I am going to say so. If something is bothering me, I am going to let it out - in a healthy way.

3) Discover More About Myself:

I've spent so much of my life with no self worth, that I have never been comfortable with who am I. How can I be comfortable with who I am, when I don't know who I am in the first place? And how can I discover who I am, when I had no self worth? Thanks to the group therapy, I dealt with the issue of having no self worth. I'm not perfect, I still have my days where my lack of self-worth creeps in, but I also bounce back from it a lot quicker. I've always wanted to take singing and acting lessons, so I am going to look into that. I've also been teaching myself to draw and realized I'm not half bad, and would love to take some drawing lessons. (I will post a picture I drew of Daryl from The Walking Dead)

I am going to stop at three New Year's Resolutions, that way I can stay inline with not over doing it. I think three is a great start. I am excited for this year. I am a confident man and I am excited to find out more about myself!